Well, I had an interesting weekend.

I had a kind of bad day on Friday, I was upset about an email that had been sent the previous evening. Shortly after I got home from work, it was resolved, though it did put a damper on my day.

I talked to Chris on the phone after work. He was also just coming home from work. So, he asked if I wanted to do something. I did. So, we planned on meeting at Starbucks. He actually fell asleep while I was in the shower, so I waited for him to call me, then called him and left a message. Finally, he called and got me on the phone. I guess he called a bunch of times and got a message that all circuits were busy. Cingular, raising the bar, my ass!

We met at Starbucks and hung out there for a couple hours actually. I kinda thought that we were only gonna hang out for a little while, but then he asked if I wanted to hang out and watch a movie. I did. We left Starbucks and he drove to my house. I stopped at a gas station to buy some beer and cigarettes.

We finally got to watch some Robot Chicken. Walt had it with him on Wednesday when I wanted to watch it with Chris. It is such a random and amusing show. We cuddled and made out, and then eventually went to sleep. Chris had to wake up early and go to work.

I slept in a little bit and then woke up. Shane and Walt were in the yard doing some work, cleaning or something. I went immediately to the new deck, smoked a cigarette and took a wonderful shower. I love that whole area. It really turned out nice.

Then, we all smoked on the deck and planned what we were gonna do. Shane and I wanted to paint. Mike was not around, and I was kind of mad about that, because he had said that he would buy a piece of furniture for the bathroom sink and also hook up the dish washer. I texted him to see if we had any paint. We had a very small amount, and Shane couldn't find any paint roller things. Walter also wanted Mike to move things out of his room so he could get a little better settled in...

So, I gathered up a lot of the dirty dishes from around the house and cleaned out 2 large coolers. I filled one up with hot soapy water, put it in the shower, and started doing dishes, or bathing the dishes, as I got quite wet while trying to rinse off dishes with a shower head.

Mike came home and hooked up the dishwasher as I finished the dishes that I had started. Then Shane and Mike went to Ace Hardware while the dishwasher ran. I was doing laundry also, and was surprised to see a river of water gushing across the floor. I found the source of the flooding- the drain to the sink is right next to the dishwasher, and since we don't have a sink... Yeah, it was open. So, I placed a bucket in front of the drain to catch leakage and mopped for quite a while.

After Shane and Mike got back, Shane and I painted the office and bathroom. We primed the office and bathroom. They look so much more finished after that. Mike hung up lights in the kitchen.

So, none of us really felt like going out, so Shane made Martini's and we hung out and watched Robot Chicken. Around 2, I got a call from an unknown number. Anyone who knows me I don't answer phone calls from unknown numbers, so I clicked the phone open and then closed again. A little while later, I had gone downstairs for a cigarette. While I was down there, I was preparing a new batch of chocolate martini goodness.

My phone rang again. I answered and no one was there. Well, someone was there, breathing all heavy. So I asked who it was, no answer... just the breathing. So, I was like, fuck this, I put the phone on top of the fridge, turned on the stereo (one of the speakers is on top of the fridge), made my martini, went outside, had a cigarette.

OK, so, anyone with the wrong number, or someone who tried to fuck with me would've hung up. No, the phone was still on. I should've just turned it off completely.

It was Matt. After a couple more minutes of him speaking in Spanish and French, he said hello and started talking. I haven't heard his voice since September. He had called me a couple days after Bob died. I was sorry that he called me to create drama. Like I said, I haven't talked to him or seen him in ages. He just wanted to be an asshole. He wanted to brag about himself, put me down and call me names. He kept bringing up Joe, and accusing me of talking to him, and things that happened between Matt and I over a year ago. It just made no sense.

He kept lying to me, or telling me blatanly contradictory things. He graduated with a 4 year degree (yet he just turned 20), I was the last person he slept with (though his boyfriend is so hot, and has such a big dick), he doesn't read my blog (but he knows a hell of a lot about my life).

Honestly, I don't feel like he has any right to judge what I have or haven't done. He hasn't been around. By his choice. And everytime he does something fucked up like this shit, he makes me aforget a little bit more of why I cared for him in the first place, his good qualities.

He admitted to calling me several times over the past week. I just hope that he doesn't call me again.

Quite some time ago, I stopped thinking of people as good or bad, and just try to just see them as people. People with their own issues, pain and fears. When I was 20, I had been with Joe for almost 2 years. We broke up shortly after I turned 21. I went through a lot of the same things with Joe. I hated him for a long time, yet desperately wanted to keep in touch with him. I stopped talking to Walter, one of our mutual friends, for a long time. Time heals a lot of wounds, but some of them you have to live with. Maybe it's how you deal with them that defines who you are...

Eventually I started talking to Joe again, and unfortunately, when he moved down here, it felt like some of the old spark was still there. As I was trying to grasp what was going on between us, what I was to Joe, I met Matt. If Matt ever did anything for me, he got me over Joe. I was crazy about you, Matt.

This is kind of directed towards him at this point, so... Apologies to everyone else who's probably bored to tears.

You can hate me as much as you want, but don't think you know me. Go ahead and read my blog, you can find out what I write, what I do. But you do not know who I am... I don't think you ever did.

Regardless, after the phone conversation, I went upstairs and was sitting by the iMac, talking to Walter, explaining what had just happened. I heard the familiar pop sound of iChat and vanquished my screen saver. With impecable timing, Chris had said hello, and said something that immediately made me feel better. I didn't finish telling Walter what had just happened. I no longer cared.